With Mother’s Day last month, our son again asked after his mother. “Where is she?” “When can we visit her?” As I’ve mentioned before Darren and I have agreed to always answer truthfully but age appropriately, that said, every time the question is asked one can’t help but feel a little uncomfortable and rejected. ‘It’s a natural response’, we always comfort ourselves with. ‘Uncomfortable and rejected’ not necessarily for fear of losing our son, but rather that emptiness exists within our son that we could never hope to fill. A yearning that he can’t yet describe but feels within his soul, a desire that fills his heart. As our son has mentioned before he just wants to visit his mom, curiosity perhaps…
The older he gets the more intense the questions are becoming, demanding more detailed answers. He is a curious boy by nature and doesn’t always accept things at face value, thank goodness! Besides, we want him to know that he can always talk openly, without fear of being judged, regardless of the topic.
Although I believe wholeheartedly that adoption is a beautiful gesture of love, let’s get real, it isn’t without its challenges. Thankfully, the good far outweighs the challenges. Like Ryan Jon in the clip below, I am sure our son has tons of questions going through his mind constantly. Emotions that will scare him at times, and answers that he may never have access to or appreciate. Or information he won’t be able to comprehend. At the end of the day we want him to live a beautiful, happy and fulfilled life and if by knowing his birth mom one day makes his happiness complete, then who are we to stand in his way?
A year after posting the above on YouTube, Ryan Jon found his birth dad. Listen to what he has to say following their meeting.
Parenting and Lifestyle Dad Blogger.
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